In primary school, my classmate Jason Rocke told me, “you run funny.” He was right. I was an awkward, skinny kid who did not have much control over my body as I ran. I felt like an amoeba moving through the water with limbs flailing everywhere. I did not know that Jason’s family were all-star athletes. Jason’s father knows a lot about physical education and shared that knowledge with his children.
When I went to secondary school, I wanted to run track, but the coaches often overlooked me. All odds against me, I did not let it deter me. If I feel passionate about something, it will get done. I realized that I am very passionate later in life, although this was not my label as a child. Where does this passion originate?
As you know from part one (team), I belong to a relatively large family of six kids. My dad has sixteen siblings, and my mom has nine siblings. Meals are often family-style, and toys are community property. My family group mentality quickly entangles and engulfs my self-identity.
However, there is something unique about winning. You get a title bestowed onto you that belongs solely to you. When you couple that entitlement and individuality with spirited child temperament, you can quickly see how this can be addictive.
I have always been a sensitive, intense, and perceptive spirited child, which means that I experience minor feelings more intensely than the average person. Perceptiveness allows me to read into situations. I use this to capture micro expressions in photography that evade most people, but let us get back on track.
The comment “you run funny.” along with a list of other criticisms, did sting. When I corrected my technique, critics told me, “you run too upright,” as well as a host of other great feedback like “you are dropping on the floor too hard,” The list goes on and on, but you get the point. The story is I had a host of errors and people who were kind enough to provide feedback.
I eventually became the 400M North Zone gold medalist in the 1988-1989 seasons with 50.9 seconds. I stepped away from the track for basketball. Jason remained an inspiration in my track history.
He poked fun at me but coached me over the years. He eventually went on to break into the 49.X seconds range in the 400M. He told me he thought if I stuck to the program, I would have broken 49 seconds, but I did not have the same faith in myself at the time.
I did go on to have a list of personal victories. Here are some standouts.
Karate: Shotokan Brown Belt (1983)
400 Meter Sprinter: Boy’s Under 17 National Finalist and North Zone Champion – 50.9 seconds (1989)
Basketball: College North Zone Champion and National Finalist- St Mary’ College (1990-1992)
Basketball: Men’s Division 2 Champion – Titians (1993)
Latin Dancer: Philadelphia and Atlantic City Professional Latin Dancer Performer (2007-2008)
Photography: International Photographer photographybycq.com (Since 2003)
Leadership: Trini Jungle Juice (Since 2003)
Philadelphia Classical School Launch Team (2011)
Viva La Carnival (Since 2015)
Rock Climbing: Average climb 5.10 (Since 2009)
Table Tennis: to be ranked but best guess rating 1500 (2020)
Here are 3 lessons of WIN:
Love your critics. Without them, you have no feedback. Those in the peanut gallery are not critics. You must be in the arena if you must be worthy of giving criticism.
You will fail far more often than you ever win. Have a positive outlook because when you lose, you learn and then you win. Be resilient to losses. Dust off yourself off and keep going. You will learn more from your failures than you ever will in your successes. The winner will be the one who get up the fastest and presses on.
WIN is personal. You are playing against yesterday’s performance, not against others who have been on the journey much longer than you have.
Your true happiness in winning is when you have finally overcome your most significant reoccurring obstacles. You were born to win, so do so.
